Talk:Food reward: Difference between revisions
imported>Juliet Carmichael No edit summary |
imported>Celine Caquineau No edit summary |
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Hey guys! Have put up all my stuff...i wasn't sure exactly what to write for the endocannabinoid/opioid systems...give it a read and see what u think (add/delete accordingly...). Also having a bit of trouble with the formatting...will see what i can do.[[User:Juliet Carmichael|Juliet Carmichael]] 21:06, 25 October 2009 (UTC) | Hey guys! Have put up all my stuff...i wasn't sure exactly what to write for the endocannabinoid/opioid systems...give it a read and see what u think (add/delete accordingly...). Also having a bit of trouble with the formatting...will see what i can do.[[User:Juliet Carmichael|Juliet Carmichael]] 21:06, 25 October 2009 (UTC) | ||
'''Your article so far:''' Overall I can see that you have done loads of work. It’s a complex and vast subject and you are dealing well with it with interesting points covered. It seems your group shows good team work with everybody contributing. Well done! | |||
However, I would advise you to slightly reorganize your article. For now it stands more like a series of articles rather than one. I’ve noticed repetitions between the first sections and it would be helpful to have, early on, an idea of the overall direction and focus of the article. So I suggest that in the introduction you start by defining important concepts such as reward, reinforcement … you can then link them with Food and mention pathways involved (dopamine, opioids, cannabinoids…). Then you can develop the concepts in different sections like you have done. This should help the understanding by all readers. | |||
My other comment will be on the writing style, remember that it’s for an encyclopaedia, the reading should flow easily, use simple sentences and add transition links between paragraphs. | |||
You are linking your facts/ studies with references in the text, well done but remember to use the Citizendium format, I’ve done it for a couple of references in your article, have a look how I’ve done it (in part 6). Finally remember to upload the bibliography page with the papers from the ‘References’ section. | |||
Im looking forward to see how your article will develop, keep an eye on the other articles, they might be talking about things to link in your article! | |||
Have a look at Solinas M (2008) 'The endocannabinoid system in brain reward processes.' PMID 18414385 that might be helpful for your last section. [[User:Celine Caquineau|Celine Caquineau]] 12:35, 28 October 2009 (UTC) |
Revision as of 06:35, 28 October 2009
Sarah Smith 14:43, 30 September 2009 (UTC)
Stefanie Maroudi Manta 18:22, 4 October 2009 (UTC)
Juliet Carmichael 22:09, 6 October 2009 (UTC)
Sarah Mee 13:30, 9 October 2009 (UTC)
Good start. Might like to take a look at this recent paper in PNAS (definitely a top journal) Jerlhag E, Egecioglu E, Landgren S, Salomé N, Heilig M, Moechars D, Datta R, Perrissoud D, Dickson SL, Engel JA.Requirement of central ghrelin signaling for alcohol reward. Proc Natl Acad Sci U S A. 2009 Jul 7;106(27):11318-23. Epub 2009 Jun 29. PMID 19564604 Gareth Leng 09:35, 13 October 2009 (UTC)
Remember, the 4 of you need to contribute! Celine Caquineau 09:34, 14 October 2009 (UTC)
How's the article going on? any plans yet?Celine Caquineau 14:19, 21 October 2009 (UTC)
Sorry I haven't posted yet, am working on my part of the article and was planning on finishing it before posting it? It should be up by the end of the week. Article is coming on nicely, we have split it into various subheadings which we are tackling independently. We are meeting this weekend to bring it all together.Juliet Carmichael 14:39, 21 October 2009 (UTC)
Hey guys! Have put up all my stuff...i wasn't sure exactly what to write for the endocannabinoid/opioid systems...give it a read and see what u think (add/delete accordingly...). Also having a bit of trouble with the formatting...will see what i can do.Juliet Carmichael 21:06, 25 October 2009 (UTC)
Your article so far: Overall I can see that you have done loads of work. It’s a complex and vast subject and you are dealing well with it with interesting points covered. It seems your group shows good team work with everybody contributing. Well done!
However, I would advise you to slightly reorganize your article. For now it stands more like a series of articles rather than one. I’ve noticed repetitions between the first sections and it would be helpful to have, early on, an idea of the overall direction and focus of the article. So I suggest that in the introduction you start by defining important concepts such as reward, reinforcement … you can then link them with Food and mention pathways involved (dopamine, opioids, cannabinoids…). Then you can develop the concepts in different sections like you have done. This should help the understanding by all readers.
My other comment will be on the writing style, remember that it’s for an encyclopaedia, the reading should flow easily, use simple sentences and add transition links between paragraphs. You are linking your facts/ studies with references in the text, well done but remember to use the Citizendium format, I’ve done it for a couple of references in your article, have a look how I’ve done it (in part 6). Finally remember to upload the bibliography page with the papers from the ‘References’ section.
Im looking forward to see how your article will develop, keep an eye on the other articles, they might be talking about things to link in your article! Have a look at Solinas M (2008) 'The endocannabinoid system in brain reward processes.' PMID 18414385 that might be helpful for your last section. Celine Caquineau 12:35, 28 October 2009 (UTC)
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