Talk:National Immigration Forum

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This article is a stub and thus not approved.
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 Definition "Interest group who seeks to continue making America welcome to immigrants" [d] [e]
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 Workgroup categories Politics and Eduzendium [Please add or review categories]
 Talk Archive none  English language variant American English

First (instructor) evaluation comments

Hi Juan,

Here are some suggestions for further improvements to your encyclopedia entry draft. I'm going to stick to the sections you've already begun developing; keep in mind, though, that you still need to fill in the others as well as the required subpages.

  • The opening line of the "Current objectives and activities" section sounds like it should follow the "Organizational structure" section, since it presumes reader familiarity with the role of the Board of Directors within the organization. Feel free to move the sections around or, if you prefer, include a clause in that sentence that briefly indicates what the Board of Directors is. Alternatively, you might rethink that first sentence so that it flows from the end of the "History" section that you'll be writing.
  • Rather than simply list the 5 goals, you might develop each one into its own paragraph or subsection in which you provide more explanation and context so that the goals are more meaningful to your readers.
  • The "Organizational structure" section would benefit from much more elaboration.

Shamira Gelbman 21:40, 7 October 2009 (UTC)

==Second (peer) evaluation comments I believe for the most part this entry is to a decent start. You have left some subgroups blank and a few of those are fairly important such as history and founding. Once you get started going through those 2 sub groups this entry will be near complete. Another inportant subgroup you have to finish is achievments, so you can let the readers know exactly what this forum has worked to achieve. Just keep working at it!