Talk:Marijuana Policy Project

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 Definition:  A non-profit American interest group that lobbies for new marijuana legislation and reform. [d] [e]
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 Workgroup categories:  politics and eduzendium [Please add or review categories]
 Talk Archive:  none  English language variant:  American English

First (instructor) evaluation comments

Hi Michael,

Here are some suggestions for further improvements to your encyclopedia entry draft. I'll stick to the sections you've already developed; keep in mind, though, that you do need to fill in the others and the related articles, bibliography, and external links subpages.

  • The intro section is pretty good; just be careful about use of the passive voice (e.g. "A specific emphasis is also placed...") and perhaps work on making the sentences flow together a bit more.
  • The "History" section would obviously benefit from a lot more development. You might begin by saying a bit more about the two founders of the organization, their motivations, and actions they took to get the MPP off the ground (and putting all this in the "Founding" subsection). Then, you might create some additional subsections to elaborate on the MPP's development since th mid-1990s.
  • In addition to laying out the MPP's current goals, you might elaborate more on what steps it's taking to achieve them. You might also elaborate more on the goals themselves.
  • You might flesh out the "Achievements" section a bit more by providing more information about each of the achievements you list. For example, which 13 states have legalized marijuana? What was the MPP's roles in achieving this accomplishment in those states? Which are the states that are "coming soon"?

Shamira Gelbman 02:55, 4 October 2009 (UTC)

Second (peer) evaluation comments

Michael You have a good beginning with your rough draft entry. Some areas of improvement within your entry would be more information on the history of the organization and a better understanding of how the founding of the organization came to be. Areas where i felt that you have done well in is in the categories of Public perception and contributions that the organization has made. These are some of the stronger areas in your rough draft and should be developed to the full potential. All in all you rough draft is in good condition and you should continue to add additional information.

Intolerable

'One may find marijuana to be completely intolerable in states nearer to the Bible Belt.' What do they put in it? Ro Thorpe 22:06, 12 November 2009 (UTC)

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